Fun Little Book for Film Obsessives

I am obsessed with movies. So when I read Zeroville by Steve Erikson and discovered within a few pages that the main character is obsessed with movies, I said, "Hey, this guy is like me." I then showed chunks of text to the Mrs. and she said, "That certainly sounds like you."

And then, about halfway through the book I realize that the main character is supposed to be emotionally disturbed on a deep, fundamental level. Ach.



I read to connect with other people. I am not good when I talk about the weather or how your kids are doing in school or about this darn economy. But get me talking about books or film or the ideas behind them and -WHOA NELLY- stand back because I won't shut up.

In January '08 I heard a Spout.com podcast from Karina Longworth about how she was visiting the Sundance film festival and realized the spirit of American Independent film was not on the screen as much as in a book she was reading in the hotel room at the end of the day.

I had to read that book.

Zeroville is a ready-made story for film obsessives. The main character is a film obsessive and the entire book is written with a series of oblique, unexplained references to film history and Hollywood lore. (Seriously, if you don't know the story about the film print of Carl Theodor Dreyer's The Passion of Joan of Arc, major plot points will be lost on you.)

Vikar, the main character shaves his head and tattoos Montgomery Clift on one half of his scalpand Elizabeth Taylor on the other half. He does this in honor of his favorite movie, A Place in the Sun. In one of the opening scenes, someone thinks the tattoos are of Nathalie Wood and James Dean, and that person gets beaten with a lunch tray because Rebel Without a Cause (Two-Disc Special Edition) is not a very good movie.

Then it gets stranger.

Vikar moves to Hollywood the weekend of the Manson murders and stays there into the 1980s. While there, he meets many different directors, editors, producers, and actors, some real, some fictional. Vikar gets involved with the film industry as works as an editor, not so much to create films but to feed his film obsession.

The book is about what it is to be obsessed with movies and what a beautiful yet horrible thing that can be. There are some scenes of frank violence interspersed between passages of very beautiful discussions of what makes art powerful.

If I were going to lob any complaints at the book, it would be that it falls into a few cutesy post-modern traps. The chapter numbers go up to a certain point, and then start descending. So you read Chapters 1 through 227 and then start reading from Chapter 227 back down to Chapter 1. And the ending of the book falls a little flat. But that is not what makes the book special.

What makes it special is that it articulates the joy, the passion, and a bit of the madness that it takes to be completely obsessed with movies.

In other words, I recommend this book.

Greasy Cheese

Over on the Spout Podcast, they issued a challenge to listeners:

Try to pitch a film with as many independent film clichés in it as possible.

You can hear some of the Spout folks' ideas here. They asked for some movie pitches and would read them on the next show.

I sent an idea, but in case it doesn't get read on the next show, I shall post it here.

Greasy Cheese

On a lonely back road... in the middle of flat Middle America... is Greasy Cheese.

Greasy Cheese is an old all-nite roadside diner, its only employees are the slightly anti-Semitic, yet lovable, owner/fry cook and the sassy, wisdom-dispensing transsexual waitress.

Rick and Carol are a young couple on the run, with only their beat up old car and a trunk full of stolen money to keep them company. Their car breaks down less than a mile from Greasy Cheese and barely limps into the parking lot before giving up the ghost. It will be a day before the tow truck can get to them, leaving the young couple stranded for 24 hours at the diner.

Enter Sheriff McBiff, the corrupt cop that really stole the money and who Rick and Carol double-crossed. McBiff is hot on the couple's trail, and will stop at nothing to get his money back, even if that means performing a one-man armed siege of an all-night diner.

During the course of a 24-hour period, a fry cook will learn the error of his ways, a corrupt sheriff's mysterious past will come back to haunt him, and a young couple on the rocks will find new love.

At turns suspenseful, hilarious, and heartwarming, Greasy Cheese is the full meal deal.

Recasting the Princess Bride

Spout.com is a great place for movie people to distract themselves while at the office.

Spout has this group called The Recasting Couch.

The idea behind this is that some movie is going to be remade, who would you cast as what? They post a film a week and everyone tries to entertain each other with creative and off the wall ideas.

This week's film is The Princess Bride. I know for a lot of people, recasting this movie is sacrilege. But I did it anyway.

Here is my entry in the contest:

Quentin Tarantino's Princess Bride

Ryan Gosling ... Westley

Uma Thurman ... Buttercup / The Princess Bride

Antonio Banderas ... Inigo Montoya

Warren Beatty ... Prince Humperdinck

Sonny Chiba ... Count Tyrone Rugen

John Travolta ... Vizzini

Danny Trejo ... Fezzik

Jake Lloyd ... The Grandson

Sam Elliott ... The Grandfather / Narrator

Samual L. Jackson ... The Impressive Clergyman

Josh Brolin ... The Albino

Bruce Willis ... Miracle Max

Rose McGowan ... Valerie

Pam Grier ... The Queen

Angie Dickenson ... The Ancient Booer

The Blog Reaches a New All-Time Low

I try to make these blog posts interesting and, if nothing else, my own thoughts. Posting videos is one thing, but writing blog entries for the sole purpose of asking you to read someone else's blog entries is something I don't feel comfortable doing. And I really don't feel 100% comfortable linking to other blogs where I commented with a note saying, "Hey world! Look at my comment! I'm so brilliant!"

But... Karina's Spout.com blog post today is a really good/interesting one. And not only was I the first to comment on it (resisting the impulse to post the word "First!"), I am (as of this writing) the only person who came up with another possible storyline for an Arrested Development movie.